How to Save and Take Over the World for Dummies
by Spice of Life
Summary: Ever wanted to take over the world? Ever felt you should go into the saving the world business? The Villians and the Good Guys take you throught the guide of How To's for conquering and capturing! NOT GOIMNG TO BE UPDATED.
1. Chapter 1: How to Save the World

**How to Save the World**

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By Kim Possible

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Saving the world sounds like a lot of work. Trust me—_it is._ It takes skill and pure intelligence to foil an evil mastermind's devious plans. Unless of course, that '_evil mastermind_' is Doctor Drakken. A blind toddler could probably defeat_ him._ Although I have to give it to him—he's harder to catch than he looks. I give most of the credit to Shego, his '_side-kick'_. Some side-kick--Without her, I'm sure he would be in an insane Asylum in Nevada by now! 

It's funny how teams work. If you take one person away, there's not a lot of chance that you'll succeed. It's like me and Ron. Everyone calls him my side-kick, but in all truth, I can't save the worlds without him. The researchers at GJ were wrong after they decided there was no 'Ron Factor'. Sure, I didn't believe it myself at first, but after awhile I realized it was completely true. I couldn't do it without him. And that's what being a team means. 

I also couldn't do it without Wade. His intelligence makes up for the IQ Ron lacks. Of course I was skeptical about working with Wade at first—who wouldn't be? A 10 year old boy helping me to save the world? _Yeah right._ But somewhere along the way, he's become part of the team too. I have yet to see him in person yet. But, who knows? Maybe one day I will. I've never met anyone (Besides Rufus, after being zapped by that Intelligence ray) that can whip up gadgets like him. Be it laser ring, night vision goggles, acid lip gloss, or the grappling hook [Although he has yet to invent one that Ron can't lose his pants with], his inventions rock. Not to mention help me beat the baddies!

Here's another pointer—if you want to save the world, and your villains seem to keep coming back, you have to get to know them. I know it sounds crazy, but it works! Take Duff Killigan—we always know what he's going to come after us with. Exploding golf balls—his specialty. Knowing what weapon they're going to use can be very handy. Monkey Fist—Ron's own personal Arch Foe—always seems to have his monkey ninjas somewhere in the shadows. His main weapon? Tai Shing Pek Kwar, also known as Monkey Kung Fu. Although I may not know Monkey Kung Fu (And that is ooh-kay.), Ron does! That combined with his deep rooted fear of monkeys, makes him the prime target of Lord Monty Fisk. 

Drakken's plans? Always taking over the world. As you can infer, his plans have yet to work. Señior Senior Sr.'s plans? To turn Señior Senior Jr. into a supervillian, which has also yet to work. Have you heard his '_evil'_ laugh yet? He is _soo_ not supervillian material. You have to give them props for trying though. Then again, they'd still be high class billionaires that sucked out Europe's power on accident if Ron hadn't let his arability to speak before thinking get the best of him. Spinning tops of doom? _Bad_ idea. But, hey—you learn from your mistakes.

You also need to have a way to get from place to place. It's not like you can ride your bike [Or an elephant, _Ron_] from Middleton all the way to South Africa! Wade always hooks us up for rides—usually with people who I've saved in past missions. Sometimes though, he calls in people who owe _him_ favors—and those rides turn out to be with things like robot propelled airplanes flying at over 300 miles an hour! Of course, I guess it's better than back-packing your way to the Sahara Desert...

Let's recap—to save the world you must

1. Have skill and know-how. It helps if you know any kinds of kung fu, karate, or gymnastics. Especially if you're fighting Shego—that girl's got some moves! Not counting her plasma shooting gloves. Yeah—avoid those. 

2. Have a team. You can't save the world alone! Having a team helps you in many aspects. They cheer you on, motivate you, and most importantly—help you defeat the bad guys!

3. Have gadgets—unless of course you have super powers! But hey, I'm no super girl. Just an ordinary crime fighting teenager. Well—okay. I'm not _that_ normal...but, where would I be without all my fantastic gadgets? 

4. Get to know your baddies. You need to figure out their weak spots, predict their next move, know what weapon they're going for, and you definitely need to figure out their plan! Unless of course, they're going by the rule book, and reveal to you their evil plan while you're dangling over a pool of hungry sharks. 

5. Have a way to get there—and no, asking the girl whose kids you babysat last night to drive you to Japan isn't going to cut it. 

Got the picture? Saving the world isn't just some past time that you can do instead of taking piano lessons (Although it got Ron out of guitar lessons. He sure could use them though!). It takes a lot of time, patience, and skill. You have to sacrifice a lot of things, like cheerleading practice, hanging out with the family, and Latin Class (Oh _darn._) But, it's all worth the while. 

Saving the World—it's what I do.

A/N—I don't know where this idea came from, but—it practically wrote itself! I _REALLY_ hope this format works...I have it centered and italicized, and it better work! There will be more to come of this, a, "Take Over the World" one by Drakken, one by Ron, one by Wade, one by Monique, one by Shego, and possibly others! Remember to reply! Much love!


	2. Chapter 2: How to Take Over the World

**How to Take Over the World**

By Dr. Drakken [Drew Theodore P. Lipsky]

Taking over the world isn't just something you wake up one day and formulate a plan for. It's something that hatches deep down inside you when you're much younger and...smarter-less. It's an evil _feeling_ that grows and grows until one day you can't control the urge any longer and…

Well, okay. That wasn't exactly the way I became an_ evil mastermind,_ but I am assuming that's how other villains bent on world conquest come about with the idea of it! That's what it said in _'Taking Over the World for Dummies—Villain's Digest Version'_, and I'm sure that they are correct!

It all started when I was much younger. It was during gym class and we were playing dodge ball…_Kids can be so cruel! _ They picked me last, and then they laughed at me! _'Drewie, don't run from the ball! Drewie, go fetch me a dodo bird! Drewie, you're going to be a blue mama's boy when you get older!'_They tormented me, annoyed me, laughed at me! They called me names in foreign languages! I did turn blue—on the _inside_. The last thread was cut when my so called friends…my…_posse_… decided I was not worthy of their friendship. They left me hangin' yo! From then on I vowed I would make them pay! Imagine my surprise when I found out that Dr. Possible was Kim Possible-my arch-rival-s father! [It was an honest mistake, I mean—they _can't_ be the only Possible's in Middleton!]

But, _Drewsie _is in the past. _Evil Blue Scientist_ is my future! And it can be for you too if you follow these seemingly simple instructions that are bound to confuse you!

The first step of taking over the world is to figure out a plan. Where will you start? Europe is always good; nice scenery. After you figure out where you start, you need to figure out exactly _how_ you're going to take over the world. Believe me—trying to hack into MP3 players does not work—unless of course you want an army of the elderly. They make excellent lemon squares, if I do say so myself. You also have to formulate how you're going to let the unsuspecting world know of your evil plans. I would recommend _not_ using a puppet bearing a resemblance of you—the civilians tend not to take your threat seriously if they think it's an episode of _Sesame Street_.

After you've written down your mastermind plan, you must find someone to help you along with it. You cannot defeat the world alone! That's why I have Shego—to fight the good guys! I'm the genius behind my plans, and she's the brawns! I wish Kim Possible hadn't found out about the 'Team Work-y' procedure...her and that buffoon always foil our plans! Not for much longer though, for I have thought of the grandest of all plans! I'll share my '_bondiggity'_ plan to you after I continue my guide!

After you've created your plan, and have your back up backed-up, you must enforce your plan! _We're gonna' get this party started bad-school, yo._ If you've carefully assessed your plan, and pull it off correctly, Kim Possible and her computer-genius friend will never even know what you're pulling off! The world will become a state of chaotic panic before she's even gotten out of bed! But, if you don't pull it off and Kim Possible and—what's his name? Reginald Stupidble? Ryan Stockable? Well, whatever it is, if you get caught by them-expect to be put behind bars for 100 to 200 years! That is of course, unless you know how to get out. Believe me; I've had my practice in escaping the fuzz!

Now that I've confided the steps on how to become a top super villain, I will now release to you the plans of my wondrous new idea to conquer the world! I will first call in some other nemesis's of Possible's—Monkey Fist, and Duff Killigan! Then, we shall locate the exact position of the Tempus Simia—a headless monkey thing. Then, we shall find the head, and it will send us back in time so we can defeat little Kimmy when she is most vulnerable! I'm having deju vu for some strange reason...Oh well, my plan _will_ work, I'm sure of it! See you on the flip side, _dawg_!

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Thanks for everybody's reviews! They ment a whole lot! Keep 'em coming! Next week I will post the Ron one. I don't know the order of the rest of them yet...and thanks to the reviewer who pointed out how to spell the Seniors' names. They're rather hard to spell, yeah? Well, anyway—R &R, make my day!

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